J: All of my roommates are sluts!

Me: (Choking on beer) What?! Then what are we doing here? What do you mean?

J: I mean they are dirty sluts. Schlampen! Their dishes are all over the kitchen. They don’t clean up their crap. It’s a mess.

Me: Oh, right. I think you mean slobs. Slut is like Hure or Nutte. You don’t want to be throwing that word around too much, especially not in the company of women.

J: Oh, that’s a big difference.

Me: Yeah, huge.

The German word for Smurfs is also very similar to the untrained ear. I accidentally called two female roommates Schlampen once when they were trying on a pair of funny hats. I meant to say Schlümpfe. Oops. You only make that mistake once.