Sore All Over

I’ve been doing something in the new apartment almost every day for 2 weeks. I only go home in order to sleep. Yesterday I put down about 40m2 of laminate flooring and my knees and hands are really sore. Today I hung some blinds. Tomorrow I might hang some light fixtures. Soon my room will be finished and I will be able to start moving stuff in.

Heil Hitler, Das Schwein Ist Tot!

An article about humor under the Nazis.

Some funny stuff. You wanna make Germans laugh about the Nazis? While sitting in a bodenständige Kneipe, take the cellophane from a pack of cigarettes and put it over your index and middle finger. Spread your fingers to make the plastic taut and put your fingers up to your lips. Ta-Da!! Instant Volksempfänger!! Same principal as a kazoo.

Now you can create your own personlized speech from the Führer or his henchmen. Just make sure you play up your most stereotypical German accent.

“From now on, all men who do not or can not emulate the Führer’s moustache, will be required to glue a fuzzy caterpillar under their noses. Caterpillars will be provided at the nearest caterpillar distribution center upon the presentation of the properly filled out forms.”

As stupid as that sounds, it’s a hit.

I know, I know. You’d think they would have sent me home by now.

Back from Amsterdam

If you’ve never been to Amsterdam, you need to go. Everything you heard about it is true x10. I’d get into seedy details but what happens in Amsterdam, stays in Amsterdam.

The Dutch are great people. Super friendly and helpful. However, I couldn’t help but notice that things aren’t as efficient there as I am used to. The train station and tourist info office were a madhouse because of the way they were run. Orders in restaurants were often wrong or they just created confusion. Maybe I’m just spoiled from living in Germany for so long. It was kind of like Italy but they spoke English.

The city center is crazy and fun and sometimes dangerous, but once you move away from the tourist fed stench of whore and hash, it is a very beautiful city. The canals and the houseboats are amazing. We saw the Jazz Festival. We saw crazy hen- and stag-parties. It was a good time.

Now we start renovating the new apartment. Hopefully we can get it all done before we move in at the end of the month.

Berlin to Amsterdam

Well we had a great couple of days in Berlin. Lots of all-night parties and crazy antics. We met the girl who does the female voice-over for MTV Germany. She got us on the guestlist for a swinging club. It was sweet. Now we are off to Amsterdam.