Éireann go Brách

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On Monday a coworker celebrated his 30th birthday. Because he is still unmarried he had to sweep at the Marktplatz. It works like this. Any man who is still unmarried by his 30th birthday has to go to the Rathouse in his hometown and sweep a huge pile of dirt/sawdust up. He is usually slightly drunk to begin with and dressed in some ridiculous outfit. He has to sweep until all the sawdust is all swept up or until he gets a kiss from a virgin. If he gets a kiss, the person who turns 30 next has to finish the job.

T. was dressed in a bright orange shaggy jacket about 10 sizes too small, a furry Elmer Fudd-like hunter’s cap and huge round black sunglasses. So in other words, he looked like a member of Dee-lite. The sawdust was laid out in the shape of a big 30 and there were 30 small bottles of liquor (schnapps, jägermeister, etc.) buried in the debris which he had to drink as soon they were discovered. He was almost done with the sweeping up the 3 when a big dog belonging to someone in attendance ran up to the plastic trash bag and tore it up spreading sawdust everywhere. Heh.

Seeing as he is a native Lüneburger, lots of childhood friends and former classmates showed up to watch him make a fool of himself.

As the small bottles of alcohol began to take effect he started harassing any woman walking by, who by any slight chance might be a virgin:

“Hey, that kid adopted?”

“Please give me a kiss. No? Fine, I’ll die from alcohol poisoning then, thanks alot.”

“Ever kissed a boy before? Now’s your chance.”

Finally some cute girl around 19 gave him a kiss. Whether she was a virgin or not, we’ll never know, but needless to say we all had our doubts.